La Rentrée 2021

My Dear Reader, welcome to yet another article where I will try to find something interesting or witty to tell you.  I have neglected you over August, but as most French people do, I closed shop and was on holiday.  Since Covid and the world going base over apex, my company has decided that we only need three weeks’ holiday in August compared to the more traditional four weeks.  I am about to sing the praises of my wife, so for those of you who hate the luvvy-duvvy side of things, turn away now.  I take it you have all turned away.  

For the first ten days of my holidays, I was camping in my living room. My wife and I literally carried our bed downstairs and set up camp.  That was the less agreeable part of those first ten days.  However, my wife had decided to decorate our bedroom and change all the furniture and replace it with nice new furniture from the infamous Swedish flat-pack place that we all know.  I have a love-hate relationship with flat packs.  Firstly, they’re heavy and hardly fit into the car without all the seats down and your wife in the back of the car telling you how to drive, you bloody moron!  Secondly, they take up an awful amount of space in the garage whilst your wife gets to grips with decorating the room.  Painting the ceiling, putting up wallpaper you agreed to ages ago because it’s easier and you love avoiding conflict.  You don’t sleep well because everything feels strange in the living room and it’s hot too.  Thirdly, they have to be taken upstairs to be put together and there’s always something missing, and you know it’s going to be your fault, you useless fool!  

Anyway, with the help of friends, my son, and a mad screaming bitch, sorry, wife, we now have a haven of peace.  We not only have a haven of peace, but fitted wardrobes that took three days to put together, but look great, and I have a cabinet for all my photography gear and, most importantly, a desk.  

She is a champion, and let me assure you all, she has become human again!  It has been a life-changer.  

During the pre-let’s get this done otherwise I’ll go mad, clear out, we found some films that needed to be developed.  You do not know what might lurk on those reels of film, but you tell yourself that you must have taken them, so it shouldn’t be too bad.  I took in 9 rolls of film in.  I was told by the amiable lady that if any of them hadn’t been exposed that there would be no charge for the development.   Seems fair.

I returned to get the films and the contact sheets.  That still sweet lady told me I would be in for a surprise!  She was right.  I looked through the sheets of paper and saw images of my son, who was still a toddler, and having baths, and being dried by his mother and his godmother.  It took me right back to the end of the last century!  My beard was in colour in those days!

Encouraged by all this photographic success, I went out and took even more photos.  For those of you who follow me on Twitter, or Instagram you will have seen the stories and saw the cameras for the day: the Mamiya C220, and the Pentax ME Super, which were both gifts from a former teacher, and now a friend of mine!  Merci Mr McM!  

I do like taking photos and using cameras.  There’s something I don’t think you knew!!  It was good to be back out.  I am now double jabbed. Thank you to that lovely lady at the chemists who reassured me and said that I wasn’t the only guy in the world that has a phobia of injections.  Not only am I double jabbed, but I also have my Covid Passport, so I can go to the pub again without having part of my brain scraped out by a nurse with a long plastic thingy!  I have rejoined the general population.  

If you’re wondering what the French title of this article is doing there, let me explain.  Quickly though, I’m already at 750 words here.  The Rentrée is the re-entry into normal daily life after the summer holidays where people just weren’t there.  The children go back to school.  Those of use in employment, go back to that employment.  Our extracurricular activities start again.  Last night was my first wind band rehearsal in over a year (thank you, COVID), and it feels as if some relative normality has come back into my life.  

Back to the photos.  I shot the square photos on the Mamiya C220, using Ilford HP5+ film shot at box speed, developed in Ilfosol 3, and I took the other photos on the Pentax ME Super, using Fomapan 100 film developed in the same chemistry.  Fine grain with the Fomapan and not something I’m used to, but a change is good, right? Oh, and I took them at the Hangar à Bananes, and HAB Gallerie in Nantes.

My wife…

Not much text today. I’m just going to let the photos speak for themselves. My wife posing for me, using the Canon 6d Mark ii, 50mm F1.8 lens, and natural light coming through my bedroom window.

KISS. Keep it Simple Stupid! Slowly becoming my new ethos…

My wife. Again…

Let me re-introduce my wife to you again. The sweet loving woman, who has been my long suffering companion, and my love, for more than 25 years, and 20 of those years married to me. She is also the only woman who could put up with me for that long too. But, when asked in front of witnesses, the Mayor, and then God, she said I do… Which means that she can’t take me back for a refund, and that she’s stuck with me. Ah les folies de jeunesse, or in English, she put a ring on it, and now it’s too late.

Anway. I’ve been trying to learn some technique to do some portrait photography, and needed a willing victim, I mean model. I found one just laying on the sofa doing some crochet , and thought you’ll have to do, and she did do! We had quite a laugh whilst doing it too!

Yes, she was a very good sport about the whole thing! She even looks as if she’s having fun. But please, don’t ever cross her, or she turns into this psycho monster. I once tried peeing standing up. That was 27 years ago. I learnt my lesson well!

Other misdemeanours include, just being in the way, breathing, speaking when she hasn’t finished telling me something, snoring, farting in bed, lifting the covers up to share, apparently sharing is caring doesn’t apply in this case, taking up too much space in bed and making her sleep on the very edge of the mattress, not leaving the toilet seat down, not shutting the door, fridge, or my mouth, not cooking, cooking when the food should already be on the table, taking too long to cook, not leaving her alone, and then leaving her alone, using the phone to talk her when we’re in the same house, and many others I’m sure. You see dear reader, we’re a perfectly ordinary couple…

But, and this is a big but, and I cannot lie, you other brothers can’t deny, hang on, that sounds familiar… I can still make her laugh, and that’s not bad. Either that or she’s far too polite to tell me that my jokes are crap…

Anyway!

The tools of the trade that day were the Canon 6D Mark II, Canon 85mm F1.8 lens, a reflector, and my panama hat.

My Wife…

I don’t usually think of myself as a portrait photographer, but I do take photos of my wife and children for family albums. I have a Helios M44-2 58mm which is a dedicated portrait lens and found a willing victim…

I say victim but she did say “yes” all that time ago. She usually hates my photos of her… No, she hates all photos of her, but here are some that said were Ok, which is praise indeed!

The Helios lens is a bokeh beast and is a wonderful focal length for portraits. I manage to use it with the Canon 6d Mark II with an conversion ring. It’s like having the best of both worlds… Digital and analogue.