Back to Hell’s Belz

Welcome back, dear reader, to my world.

Today we will talk about families, food, being a hero, and more family, and kir. I know you can’t wait, so let’s begin.

Arrival in Bretagne

It was early evening and we eventually arrived in Bretagne, feeling very warm, surprisingly peaceful, and ready for whatever the weekend had in store for us. Or so I thought, but more about that later.

We arrived and my mother-in-law was talking to some people with Southern accents. Strange… But I recognised something in the gentleman’s voice. It was Raymond and Sylvie who are friends with Marina, my sister-in-law, and Vincent, her husband. You’re going to meet quite a few members of the family, so try and keep up. Vincent is deaf and has a hearing loss of 94%. Raymond was completely deaf, but had had a cochlear implant and could now hear! Isn’t science amazing. Sylvie is his wife.

L’Apéro – The Social Ritual That Just Happens

As will happen in summer, especially in France, we settled down to have the apéro. What an amazing invention. I have talked about this before, but they just seem to happen and people just know what to do and fit naturally into their respective roles. We talked about our hearing aids, and the difference they made in our lives. And started cracking jokes and basically having a good time. I was on the fizzy mineral water—you never know when you might need a driver.

Crisis Calls – Jessica and Xavier Need Rescue

We were in coastal Bretagne and it was nice to be back seeing Gisèle, my mother-in-law. The conversation was flowing and it was turning out to be a lovely evening. The phone rang. For once, Gisèle heard the phone and answered it. She has hearing problems too. Jessica, my wife’s other sister, and her husband Xavier, had been in La Rochelle and had taken a coach to get back home. That coach was late, and the boat back had stopped running. Ian to the rescue.

Xavier and I are the black sheep of the family, and get the most criticism. Xavier, because he is Xavier, and me because I’m not French. After 30 years we have become accustomed to our rôles and are secretly proud of it.

To the Rescue – Loca Loca Restaurant, Here We Come

I reminded my mother-in-law how shitty it can be when a plan, well, doesn’t go to plan—even more so when it’s not your fault. I said, right, let’s get in the car and go and get them. My mother-in-law would be the navigator. She asked if my car was a new car. I wasn’t, but it would be nice if it were. And wasn’t it far to drive? No, it wasn’t. She would have told them to stay the night with their son. True, but isn’t it nice, at the end of a long day of plans going wrong, to have something that goes right? It’s good to be good, etc.

Embrassades and Bises – Reunited at Last

We arrived at the station and couldn’t find each other. Gisèle was starting to get worked up, and I just calmed the situation down. Jess, you where? OK. I don’t know how to get there but I saw the Loca Loca restaurant. Can you both go there? They could. I drove round the block and I’m not sure whether where I parked was legal, but no flying farts were given, and that would be where I would be parking to pick them up. Embrassades and the famous “bise” and let’s get that case into the boot. Try and find a place on the back seat. They found a place on the back seat. And back to Belz to get them home. Yes, it’s good being good.

Kir, Shrimps, and a Forgotten CPAP Machine

Gisèle and I got back to her house, and the Kir was flowing and now it was my turn to have a few. Very nice it was too. We talked, talked, and talked some more, and Raymond went back to Sylvie and Gisèle, my wife and I decided to eat. Shrimps, homemade mayonnaise, and boiled potatoes. Simple, and wonderful!

We were to sleep in the bureau. My wife was upset at me because I had forgotten my CPAP machine. I would just go to sleep and enjoy the night… Tomorrow would be another day, full of adventure. Well, everything is relative I suppose. I will see you, Dear Reader, tomorrow…

Happy Not Dead Day 2024

As the years go by, birthdays become less about childish excitement and more about a blend of nostalgia, forced fun, and a dash of introspection. My recent birthday weekend was a good example, taking me from childhood memories to the present day, all while grappling with my inner aversion to “my” birthday celebrations.

I’m still not good with birthdays. After 52 of them they have turned from an exciting day with wonderful birthday parties organised by my mother and Aunty Colette helping out, with a homemade and home decorated cake, various bottles of pop, and hula-hoop crisps. This was the 1970’s after all.

In the 1980’s this evolved into being asked what kind of cake I wanted by Matron, choice of fruit or chocolate, that would be shared amongst all the boys at school, and receiving Thornton’s toffees sent in a parcel by my grandmother, to going out to the cinema with a friend, and getting run over crossing the street, but thankfully not injured, to preparing a dinner for friends.

Everything changed when I moved to France in the 1990’s. Birthday celebrations evolved from lively parties to intimate gatherings amongst friends, where the focus shifted from just cake to the simplicity of shared meals and conversation.

The 2000s and 2010s saw a familiar rhythm to my birthday celebrations, with the occasional variation in cake flavours and dining arrangements. Then my own children came along, and now they eagerly take on the role of party planners, injecting their own energy and enthusiasm into my special day.

My most recent birthday weekend was a fair blend of forced fun and begrudging acceptance. Friday night found me in my favorite pub, sharing stories and laughter with my son, an attempt to appease his desire to celebrate. Saturday was a day of family bonding, as I took my daughter and her boyfriend into town, dropped them off, went through two rolls of film, and then enjoyed a quiet evening at home cooking with my son.

In between, I indulged in my passion for photography, capturing fleeting moments of joy amidst the forced festivities. I also sought a moment of reflection during confession, seeking a bit of solace amidst all the attention. The night ended with a hearty meal prepared with my son, a small act of rebellion against the excessive birthday fanfare.

Sunday dawned early, as I set off to Saint Nazaire for an early 6am start and a performance at the Folles Journées, a celebration of classical music. The day concluded with a heartfelt moment at mass, surrounded by the love of my family.

As Monday morning approached, I carried a mix of emotions – the warmth of cherished memories, the exhaustion of forced celebrations, and a growing appreciation for the love and attention from my children. I was ready to face the working week, armed with the knowledge that birthdays, despite their uncomfortable nature, could be occasions for reflection, connection, and a touch of forced fun.

Do I feel older and wiser? Definitely the former, and to some small extent, the latter. Children, and especially older children, have this uncanny way of reminding you that you are evolving, despite loving every bit of you. It’s a humbling experience, and at the same time a display of love. I am veritably lucky to have them.

As I write this, a part of me still cringes at the thought of birthdays, but another part cherishes the memories they create and the love they represent. So while I may never fully embrace the birthday craze, I’ll continue to participate, albeit with a touch of begrudging acceptance and a sprinkle of nostalgic fondness.

Happy “Not Dead Yet” day to me! Still there to annoy the shit out of you, be really foul mouthed, and be completely inappropriate with everyone…
But I do love you all! Some of you I even like!

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A Peaceful Stroll Through Jardin de Plantes

The Jardin de Plantes is a quiet spot in the middle of a busy city, and my niece came along for a walk through it with me — Pentax ME Super loaded with Kentmere 100.

That day there was a bonus: sculptures and installations from the Voyage à Nantes were dotted around the garden, mixed in with the usual plants and paths. Away from the noise of the city, it was an easy, unhurried couple of hours.

My niece explored every corner while I got on with the Pentax, the Kentmere 100 doing its usual job. Nothing dramatic, just a good afternoon out with a camera.